Learning how to sexually please a partner can be difficult for anyone, and continuing to please them throughout a relationship can be even more challenging.

What happens when your physical relationship starts to dwindle? What if you are no longer able to perform in those tried-and-true ways? And how do you learn about the desires of a new partner, especially if it has been awhile since you last dated? 

We’ve found understanding what women want can be a particular challenge for their male partners. Many people are looking tips on how to turn a woman on, especially as relationships and bodies change. Research from psychologist Roy Baumeister suggests that women “have a much more variable sex drive, far more responsive to surrounding circumstances.” For men, whose sex drives are more biologically-controlled, this can add up to a whole lot of confusion.

Here are some of the things women most crave in the bedroom – and how you can give them what they want at any point in the relationship.

Women want emotional closeness

Pioneering research on male and female sexuality suggests that context matters a lot to women, and that emotional closeness is an important part of how to turn a woman on.

Paying positive compliments to a woman throughout the day, especially about her appearance, can help her get in the mood when it comes time to get busy. Believe it or not, helping with chores and opening up about your feelings can also help build intimacy and trust. It may not sound sexy, but it can make a big difference in the bedroom.

Women want patience

Most women take longer than men to achieve orgasm, so your patience will definitely be required from time to time.

If you seem exhausted or frustrated about the amount of time it is taking, you may make it difficult for her to fully enjoy the experience. Take care to make sure she gets what she desires, and be willing to commit to her needs…even if they take longer than you would like.

Women want communication

I know, this is a BIG topic, but stick with me. Although communication is key at every stage in the relationship, there are two instances in the bedroom where it is really important:

  • Women orgasm less frequently than men during sex, so it is important to discuss expectations surrounding this subject. A woman who is not reaching orgasm every time may still be enjoying the experience. Alternatively, a woman who can’t seem to reach orgasm could give you a few tips to get her there more frequently.
  • Because female sexuality tends to be more contextual, storylines can play a larger role in personal turn-ons. Ask your partner to share romance novels, erotic stories, or fantasies they enjoy.

In short, if you want to know how to turn a woman on, an intimate conversation might be the secret.

The most important thing to communicate about in a relationship

Throughout the years, a woman’s body can change dramatically. Childbirth, menopause, weight gain/loss, and other life events can make a big difference in female sexuality.

And guess what? Men’s bodies can change too. Some of those changes are the natural result of aging, but others – like erectile dysfunction – can and should be looked into by a doctor.

Erectile dysfunction affects around half of Canadian men over 50, many of whom struggle to address the issue with their partners. If this is something you are struggling with, we can offer support through our personalized treatment programs. For a free consultation, call us at 1-844-500-1177 or schedule an appointment online today.

Written by Shauna Vert